The harm in asking

Last night I got lonely. It was about 12:30 am and I was just a little scared and just a little in need of company. Sometimes a phone converstation works but sometimes I need someone with me. I called C and woke him up - he did not mind. But then, becuase I did not want to "ask" something.... we launched into a 2 hour long arguement over the phone. Yes, in the end he did come over but only after threatening not to a couple of time and I was still angry... I am still angry. The problem started with this.

We had already been on the phone for about 10 minutes making small talk....

C: So why can't you sleep
J: I just don't want to be alone tonight.
C: And....
J: and I am lonely.
C: Do you want me to come over?
j: Of course.
C: Ask me.
j: What?
C: Ask me to come over or I won't. I need you to ask me more things
J: I should not have to ask right now. You already said it.
C: But I want to hear you ask me.
J: No. I want you to do it becuase you feel I need you here not becuase I had to be forced to ask - something I hate doing in any situation.

It got worse from there. Way worse. I told him it is very insulting to me to be 'walked through' asking as if I was a child. He says he does not feel appreciated, that I need him enough, and that he is wanted. I told him the truth... I give him all I can right now and I even give him more attention than I do the boys some day. He says it is not enough. I have to need him and ask him for more things, ask him to do more and be more. Ask him.

I don't want to. Maybe it is odd but I would like him to just respond to me as I am and find happines where he is. That is the way that a relationship should work...thinks I.

We fought 'bout the fact I like to tell him thing that bother me - but I am not looking for him to offer solutions to all my problem and then get angry when I decided not to follow his suggestions. He thinks I don't tell him enough about my day and that I don't let him solve my issues and problem. I don't want him to. I want to be able to talk to him like a friend. Just talk with a little empathy from him. If I want a suggestion from him... I will ask. Just be a friend.

It kept on going. He can't understand people unless they are blunt. I am not a blunt person... I like how I talk but he thinks it is all wrong.

I am frustrated.